Are you free or are you dom?

I know we are free now. Pass laws have been abolished. But, seriously, where was everyone on Freedom Day?? Honestly, can I get an answer.

The day begun abruptly as the sun seared into my eyes and I rolled out of bed to attend a meeting, after a heavy night at Club Hush. An unsolicited debit order had gone off my bank account and I was determined not to let anything get between me and money. I HAD to reverse the transaction, so off to FNB (the best bank) I drove- without bathing but wearing the right attitude and copious amounts of deodorant. Only to find the bank closed..

Then I decided to go to Meltz, because I heard they were going under liquidation, yet, alas it was me who was liquidated. After Meltz, I went Waka and was like:

I bought a water jug and kitchen knives at Adams Discount store. I'm bad.

Skip past the chores and enter the finale of Come Dine With Me. The highlight of the event was the sex toy presentation by a very nervous Cara of Bella Rouge. For other people these were sex tips to spice up their bedroom lives, for me it was purely educational. It was quite fascinating, but the thing that interested me the most was the lengths that women will go to please men. Do men host sex parties? Do men sit and try to find solutions on how to keep the weight off, wash and feed the baby plus, excel at their careers without a nanny? (That's its own topic)

Hit fast forward again. Now Miss B, Zani and I are in Braamfontein….

Expecting this:

                             

But got this:

Thirty minutes later, we go to Randlords, expecting this:

The cover charge made us:

Back in the car, off to Melville, with the motto: No cover charge; no problem! What we found was………

We had a problem because we were looking like this:

                                                            Ok, not quite, but close

We hit the car, off to Sandton Newscafe, now in pursuit of

A Sweet Brown wanna be waitress told us the kitchen was closed, and we ended up at

So, where were you?